Today 2×2 references Seth Godin’s blog offering for today,
Bullying Is Theft.
Seth writes about bullying—something all church people are against in theory but often fail to recognize in practice. That’s how bullies thrive!
As Seth points out, good bullies have a knack for dehumanizing their targets. Victims’ cries, protests, and pleas cannot be heard. They are kooks and malcontents. “We have to trust the wisdom of our leaders” is the defense—even if it makes no sense. There is something (usually unnamed) very wrong with victims. They deserve what they are getting.
“Why don’t they accept things and move on?” is the easy question which is designed to justify their “moving on.” They count on people buckling under threats. Wounds may never heal but at least the damaged goods are out of the way. Bullies have a pretty good system!
2×2 has written about this before. Church people have a difficult time discerning that this is a topic that might include them. Ironically, the Church occasionally gives workshops about bullying, failing to see the characteristics among their own.
Bullying behavior in the church is wrapped up in a beautiful package of tradition, status and carefully chosen quotations from scripture to camouflage the ugliness. Hard to see. Hard to argue. Hard to stop.
Ask the hundreds of victims of clergy pedophilia. It took decades to bring the perpetrators to justice. The victims suffered the whole time, desperate for the people they trusted to take action on their behalf.
Bullying behavior reaches beyond this abominable reality. It permeates church structure, silencing the innovators and creatives —limiting them to acceptable creativity (good organ music). Even the Lutheran church with its proud heritage of sainthood and equality of all believers loses its way. If those who recognize the bullying move on, as even Seth suggests is one solution, the church is the loser. Congregations become similar in scope, style and service. Only the names and faces change. New people. Old roles.
Sound familiar?
Perhaps the church should calculate the cost of failing to deal with bullying in the church. Seth’s arguments are persuasive in this regard. It may very well be the root cause of mainline decline. Bullying in the church thins the ranks of the creative—the thinkers, the questioners, the givers, the risk-takers (which every organization needs!). It is theft!
Read Seth’s post today and ask, “Have our church leaders treated member churches this way?”
And then read Showdown on Midvale Avenue and a related post.